Longhauling back to Pluto

I'm now back on the island, having been away in London & Johannesburg for 2 weeks. It was a good trip and wonderful to see everyone again. In Joburg I managed to do some 'local' things like go to the Ridge farewell for Trishie Parker and my SA Book Club Christmas Lunch. In London, my dear friend Ailsa hosted a dinner for my London Friends & I, and since she is a professional cook (regularly for David Cameron, I'll have you know) it was all very delicious. I also did lots of Extreme Shopping, mainly at Woolies - and came home with piles of island clothes, christmas wrapping paper and toys. All of this plus my 81 year old Mother, had to be lugged back over the Atlantic Ocean, and we flew out just in time to have Gatwick close behind us, due to the snow and ice.

Having been away from South Africa for 3 months, several things jump out at one, which clearly I'd been missing in the Caribbean. My strongest observation is that everyone smiles all the time - on the streets, in the shops, when they are trying to sell you stuff at traffic lights etc. It made me realise that here is not very smiley, in fact the general mien is grumpy with a dose of indifference and impatience thrown in for good measure.

I was then overwhelmed by the level of 'boutique hotel' living everyone enjoys in their own homes in Johannesburg. This included:

1. Folded pyjamas under the beautifully made bed, which was turned down at night

2. Tea - made & brought to one, on a tray with a tray cloth and a homemade biscuit

3. Suitcases unpacked, cothes hung up and/or washed, ironed and returned.

Not for nothing that my good friend says that 'they can switch the lights off round me, but I'm staying here with my bediendes'. In fact someone in Johannesburg very boldy stated that Housework Makes You Ugly. I sadly now have little choice but to get on with it as I'm no longer a SA Princess. So it's back to my jumbo bottles of Fabuloso and 'Spray & Pray' as Billy delightfully coined it.

The flight was pretty awful. We had the requisite screaming baby for 7 hours from London to Antigua, with me very loudly barking "It needs some Calpol' like Tourettes Syndrome, and then sticking my headphones on to listen to the The Suburb's 'Arcade Fire' three straight times in a row - also very loudly. We got to Antigua with relief, only to see the same family boarding the little plane to Tortola. It's a cruel world. The baby then continued to scream, falling into an exhausted sleep somewhere over St Kitts & Nevis. It is at times like these, that we are all very grateful that rum is so cheap in the Caribbean, in fact they should have given it to the baby (which was teething). Bugger the Calpol.

So I'm back in my sparkly life with my little brown boys, who are about to break up for the Christmas hols on Wednesday. Tortola really did feel like Pluto whilst I was away - it seemed so far away and so unimaginable, particulalry in the freezing sleet and slush of London. But it's real, I'm here and I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. Our container is meant to be arriving this week, and I feel slightly weak at the knees about where we are going to put everything and all the unpacking, but nothing that lots of rum and a machette can't sort out.